How to Stay Calm and Collected During English Conversations

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Calm English Conversations – Introduction

Have you ever found yourself panicking mid-conversation, even though you know the words in English?

Your heart races. Your mind goes blank. You worry you’re not making sense.

You’re not alone – and you’re not the only one who’s experienced this in a work setting.

In my previous articles, Strategies to Overcome Language Anxiety and Overcoming the Fear of Speaking English in Public, I focused on emotional blocks and the fear of public speaking. If you haven’t read them yet, those are great starting points.

But what about everyday conversations? A one-to-one video call, a quick chat with a colleague or answering a question in a meeting?

In this article, I’ll show you practical ways to stay calm and confident during English conversations so that you can focus on connection – not perfection.

Slow Down Your Speech (and Your Thoughts)

One of the simplest ways to stay calm is to slow everything down.

You don’t need to speak fast to sound fluent. In fact, slower speakers often sound more thoughtful and confident.

Try this:

Breathe before you speak.
Pause naturally between ideas.
Use connecting phrases like “Let me think for a second…” or “That’s a great question…” to buy time.

By slowing down, you reduce pressure on your brain – and give yourself space to respond more clearly.

Use a Simple Structure to Organise Your Thoughts

It’s easy to panic when you feel like your ideas are scattered.

A simple solution? Use a basic conversation framework. Here’s one that works in almost any situation:

Acknowledge → Answer → Add

Example:

“That’s a good question.” (Acknowledge)
“I think the main issue is the deadline.” (Answer)
“We’ll need to check in with the team this week.” (Add)

This keeps your speech clear and calm – and helps you avoid rambling or going blank.

Prepare “Go-To” Phrases in Advance

In many conversations, the situations repeat. You get asked similar questions, or you often make the same types of points.

That’s good news! Because you can prepare short, reliable phrases, you feel confident saying.

Examples:

“I’d love to hear your thoughts on that.”
“Could you clarify what you mean by…?”
“That’s outside my area, but I’ll find out.”

Having a few of these in your back pocket gives you a solid foundation – and helps you avoid feeling caught off guard.

Need help building a bank of phrases like this? That’s exactly the kind of support you’ll find in my professional English community, where we practise real conversation techniques in a low-pressure setting.

Accept (and Normalise) Imperfection

Let’s be honest – no one speaks perfectly all the time.

Native speakers pause, change their minds and even forget words. It’s completely normal.

Remind yourself that it’s okay to:

Make a grammar mistake.
Mispronounce a word.
Ask for clarification or repetition.

Instead of aiming for perfection, aim for connection. Your goal is to communicate, not perform.

If anxiety starts creeping in, say to yourself: “I’m allowed to be human”. This slight mindset shift can keep you grounded in the moment.

Ground Yourself Physically

When you start to feel nervous, bring your attention back to your body.

Try these simple physical grounding techniques:

Place your feet flat on the floor and feel the ground beneath you.
Rest your hands on your desk or in your lap.
Take one slow, deep breath and relax your shoulders.

These small actions calm your nervous system and help you stay present during the conversation.

Bonus tip: Keep a calming object nearby – a pen, a cup of tea, a soft scarf – something small that reminds you to breathe and relax.

Focus on Listening, Not Just Speaking

Often, we’re so focused on what we’re going to say next that we stop truly listening, creating more pressure – and more anxiety.

Shift your focus. Really listen to the other person. Let them finish their thoughts. React naturally.

When you listen well:

You buy time to think.
You understand better.
You build rapport – which takes the pressure off performance.

And guess what? You’ll also feel more present and less anxious.

Practise Staying Calm Under Gentle Pressure

Confidence doesn’t come from theory – it comes from experience.

The best way to stay calm during conversations is to practise calmness in realistic situations.

Here’s how:

Record short voice notes responding to common questions.
Role-play with a friend, tutor or language partner.
Join a live speaking group where the focus is on support, not perfection.

That’s precisely what we offer in my English for Work community. It’s a space where professionals like you can build calm, confident communication skills together.